The Internet is full of weirdness. Here is one of them – a human body energy clock. It advises you on what to do at any particular time in a day. Apparently, different organs of your body are activated at different times. Yes, ladies and gentlemen, our body has an internal clock that is synced to the local time. 🙂
Needless to say, this is a load of bullshit with gems like the spleen being imbued with mental powers. People, the spleen is not our second brain! Many of us may wish we were smarter but your spleen isn’t going to help you with any thinking.
Our heart does not help us socialise with other people. Our kidneys do not have energy reserves that need to be restored. And our pericardium is useless as far as sex is concerned. The creator of this “human body energy clock” obviously has absolutely no idea what the various organs do.
But I’ll bet that there are many people who will fall for this kind of bullshit.
So, do everyone a favour and please stop sharing this. If you want to share, please share this article instead, so they can be educated about the true nature of these organs.
There is no need to scroll further down, unless you want a point by point take down of the ludicrous “human body energy clock” above. If you are up for some reading, let’s take a look at the claims / suggestions and see what’s true and what’s false.
11 AM – 1 PM : Heart
The “Advice” : Eat lunch & socialise! Enjoy conversations, connect with people, and cooperate. Reach out to people, be of service. Nutritious balanced lunch, not too filling.
The Truth : What the heck has the heart got to do with socialising over lunch? How does reaching out to people “to be of service” impact the heart? Isn’t the STOMACH a much more appropriate organ to tackle your lunch?
The heart is the organ that pumps blood through our circulatory system. It works harder when our body needs more oxygen, and beats slower when our body is at rest.
1 PM – 3 PM : Small Intestine
The “Advice” : Solve your problems & get organised. Sort out issues. The body is digesting lunch.
The Truth : It looks like the creator of this “clock” thinks that the food travels from the heart to the small intestine… and that the small intestine is the organ to help you organise stuff and solve problems. Obviously, none of that is true. #facepalm
The small intestine is the organ where most of our food digestion takes place. As important as that is, it cannot help you solve problems or organise anything.
3 PM – 5 PM : Bladder
The “Advice” : Work, study, and drink tea! Best time for efficient work and to have your afternoon tea. Drink tea, more water, and detox!
The Truth : The best time for efficient work, and you want to waste it on an afternoon tea? No wonder nothing gets done anymore… The bladder is part of the excretory system but it cannot “detoxify” anything.
The bladder is nothing more than the organ that collects and stores the urine from the kidneys so you can pick when you want to urinate. Without it, your urine will just dribble out as it is produced.
5 PM – 7 PM : Kidneys
The “Advice” : Eat dinner and restore your energy. Your kidneys store your energy reserves. If you feel tired, what did you spend your energy on? Put yourself first.
The Truth : The creator of this “clock” has confused the kidney with the liver (as well as muscles), where our body has its “ready-to-use” glycogen energy reserves; and the fat cells, where we keep our “fat reserves”. The kidneys do NOT store any energy reserves.
The kidneys remove metabolic waste products, thereby “detoxifying” our body, while regulating our body’s pH and blood pressure, as well as produce hormones for various functions. They do not store any energy reserves.
7 PM – 9 PM : Pericardium
The “Advice” : Socialize, flirt, and have fun! Pericardium is responsible for circulation, brain and reproductive organs. Best time to conceive, have sex, get a massage.
The Truth : The creator of this “clock” is taking the phrase “I love you with all of my heart” too literally… I would love to see him use his pericardium to have sex. The pericardium (which stands for “around the heart”) is just a tough sac that surrounds and protects the heart against shock.
9 PM – 11 PM : Triple Warmer (Thyroid & Adrenals)
The “Advice” : Responsible for energy transfer, temperature and metabolism. Avoid eating. Chill out, relax and read!
The Truth : The hypothalamus is actually the organ that regulates body temperature but the thyroid and adrenal glands produce hormones that regulate the body temperature and metabolism, amongst other things.
However, they don’t produce extra hormones at any specific time to increase “energy transfer, temperature and metabolism”. If they really did so, we would all be jumping around like Energiser bunnies late at night!
11 PM – 1 AM : Gallbladder
The “Advice” : If you have gallstones, you may have pain at this time. Sleep and regenerate!
The Truth : If you have gallstones, you will have pain at any time of the day although they often happen at night (when you are starting to rest) or after a fatty meal. When you get an attack, good luck sleeping to “regenerate”! Consult a doctor. Don’t “sleep it off”.
1 AM – 3 AM : Liver
The “Advice” : Deep resting and dreaming! Alcohol, chemicals, drugs, poor diet all need detox by liver. If you wake up at this time, your liver is overwhelmed by the detoxing process.
The Truth : Frankly, I’m overwhelmed by the amount of bullshit and stupidity in this section. The liver metabolises and breaks down toxic substances for excretion ALL THE TIME. It doesn’t just do it in the wee hours of the morning. It certainly wouldn’t wake you up if it’s “overwhelmed” by work. What would it wake you up for? To get help?
3 AM – 5 AM : Lungs
The “Advice” : Sleep soundly! If you cough at this time, your lungs are expelling toxins.
The Truth : The only toxin our lungs expel is a gas called Carbon Dioxide (CO²), and it does so non-stop. It doesn’t wait to do this for just two hours early in the morning! If it really did this, you would be dead.
5 AM – 7 AM : Large Intestine
The “Advice” : Wake up and drink water! 16+ oz water. Go for a brisk walk. No caffeine at this hour. Your body needs water for a healthy colon.
The Truth : There is no reason why you cannot drink anything with caffeine so early in the morning. Keeping well-hydrated is always a good idea, but waking up in the early morning just to drink water? FYI, the colon takes about 16 hours to finish absorbing water and whatever nutrients is left over in your meal, so you can drink water before you go to sleep and it would still be working to absorb it when you wake up.
7 AM – 9 AM : Stomach
The “Advice” : Eat breakfast! Fruit, protein, low GI carbs, healthy fats. Take vitamins. Pack lunch and snacks.
The Truth : For a clock that suggest 3 meals a day, it’s hilarious to suggest that our stomach only becomes activated for breakfast. In any case, you do NOT need to take vitamin supplements if you are on a good diet, like the suggested diet of fruits, protein, low GI carbohydrates and healthy fats.
9 AM – 11 AM : Spleen
The “Advice” : Work and be active! The spleen is associated with mental powers, supports metabolism, and is responsible for converting nutrients into energy.
The Truth : This is literally the FUNNIEST advice of the entire clock. The spleen is NOT our second brain. The spleen is really a “blood filter” that also synthesises antibodies to combat infection. It removes and recycles old red blood cells, as well as bacterial cells that are coated by its antibodies.
The spleen has NO mental powers, does NOT support metabolism and is certainly NOT responsible for converting nutrients into energy. That’s the brain, the thyroid gland and the digestive system (stomach, small and large intestines, liver and pancreas).